Cookies & Cream Cupcakes

Have you ever had a moment where you just can't choose what to eat to satisfy your sweet tooth? All the options look too good to pass up, and you wish you could just have all the desserts in the world at the same time (for those who might be wondering, no, I don't have a case of the munchies: I just get naturally really hungry)! Well this recipe is awesome, because you don't have to choose between having a cupcake or having a cookie: you CAN have them both at the same time!

I originally came across the idea of mashing those two desserts together while flipping through "Vegan Cupcakes Take Over the World", and I remember thinking that it was sheer brilliance. (As a side-note, you should totally get this book: the recipes are very original and inspiring, and they are easy!! Everything I have tried from it so far has been yummy, and didn't even really require the use of my stand mixer. If you are terrified of baking, this book will cure your fears!)

What is it about Oreo cookies that is so awesome? It really seems to bring the inner child out of everyone! Perhaps it's because kids have been dipping them in their milk for over a hundred years. Whatever the reason, they have been sneaked in many dessert recipes: brownies, ice cream sandwiches, pie crust, puddings, milk shakes... I occasionally indulge in Hershey's infamous Cookies & Cream candy bar, and I almost lost my mind when my boyfriend brought home a container of Nestle's Cookies & Cream ice cream... I can't get enough of those damn cookies in every form, so I just had to try the cupcake version...

I worked with the book's recipe, so those cupcakes are fully vegan, but if you have any basic, reliable chocolate cupcake and buttercream recipes you love, you should feel free to simply get yourself a bag of Oreos and tweak your own recipes just a little bit so you can get this spectacular dessert!

Start by getting 1 bag of Oreos, or other cream-sandwich cookies you like.

• Coarsely chop about 10 cookies, for the batter (you need about 1 cup of coarse crumbs).

• Separate the cookie from the cream of 5 more cookies, and finely mash the cookies, for the frosting (you need about 1/2 cup of those fine crumbs). This done really easily by putting your cookies in a plastic bag and mashing them with a rolling pin. Roll the rolling pin on the bag until the cookies are reduced to a fine crumb.

• Slice 6 whole sandwich cookies in half-moons, for the final touch

1 cup unsweetened non-dairy milk (I usually use soy milk)
1 teaspoon apple cider vinegar
3/4 cup cane sugar
1/3 cup canola oil
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/2 teaspoon almond extract
1 cup all-purpose flour
1/3 cup cocoa powder
3/4 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
1/4 teaspoon salt

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees, and line a 12-muffins pan with cupcake liners. Whisk together the milk and vinegar in a large bowl, and set aside to curdle for a few minutes. Add the sugar, oil, vanilla extract and almond extract to the milk and beat until foamy.

In a separate bowl, sift together the flour, cocoa powder, baking soda, baking powder and salt. Add the coarse cookie crumbs to the dry ingredients, and mix.

Add the dry mixture in 2 batches to the wet ingredients, and beat until there are no large lumps left (a few tiny lumps is OK). Divide the batter into the liners, filling them about 3/4 of the way.

Bake for 18 to 20 minutes, until a toothpick inserted in the middle comes out clean. Transfer to a cooling rack and let the cupcakes cool completely before frosting.

1/2 cup non-hydrogenated vegetable shortening, at room temperature
1/2 cup non-hydrogenated margarine, at room temperature
3 1/2 cup confectioners' sugar (you may need a little bit more or less, depending on how stiff you want your buttercream)
1 1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/4 cup unsweetened soy milk

Beat the shortening and margarine together until well combined and fluffy.

Add the sugar and beat for 3 more minutes, add the vanilla extract and soy milk, and beat for another 5 to 7 minutes, until fluffy.

Add the fine cookie crumbs, and mix until they are uniformly combined to the frosting.

When the cupcakes have cooled, generously pile on some frosting (a rubber spatula is your best friend for this step), and crown each cupcake with half a sandwich cookie (don't try to pipe that frosting down: the little cookie bits make that rather complicated and frustrating).

I have to say, even if I usually prefer using real butter in baking, this cupcake recipe really does make a perfect, moist and tender chocolate cake that will fool a traditionalist' palate: no one would ever guess this is egg and dairy-free! And while the words "vegan buttercream" make me roll my eyes, this icing is thick, fluffy, sweet and indulgent. The assembled cupcakes are also the cutest thing.

And they taste exactly like cookies & cream ice cream... Make sure to a have a nice big glass of (non-dairy... let's keep this vegan, shall we?) milk to wash all that delicious sweetness down.

Mrs. Scrooge and the Gingerbread Men

I am not a Christmas person. At all. Several years of working retail during the Holidays and being subjected to Mariah Carey's "All I Want For Christmas" twenty times a day left me with some permanent psychological scars. Here is a short list of Christmas-y things that I genuinely love, despite my allergy to the most wonderful time of the year...

• Frank Sinatra singing Christmas songs. In my worldview, only Frank should be allowed to sing those sappy songs, and sadly, he's dead. Others who attempt to emulate him ought to have their lips sewn shut (I'm looking at you, Justin Bieber!).
• Charles Dickens' "A Christmas Carol" (especially the Muppet version). Ironic, I know, given the fact the I am Mrs. Scrooge herself. But this story is about the true spirit of the Holiday, i.e. sharing and caring for each other. That Christmas spirit has been flat-lining for a while, as far as I can see when I look at the rabid masses of consumers who soured the season for me. I am sad to say that I can count the people who hold that old-school Christmas spirit on the fingers of one hand.
• Holiday baking. Although, that's really just my gourmande streak speaking, as I bake all year long. But I do admit to having lots of fun with Christmas-themed baking (two cupcake recipes with special Holiday flavors are coming soon!).

Which brings me to my all-time favorite Christmas goodie: gingerbread cut-out cookies. I am ginger-crazy, so my love for those cookies goes without saying. But I am especially fond of gingerbread men (and women; I don't discriminate) because I can go all Dexter on them! I just love to dismember, decapitate and waterboard (or milkboard, in this case) my gingerbread men before eating them.

Yes, yes, I have issues, I know. But come on! Didn't you love the Gingy torture scene in "Shrek"? Now you can do that at home! This recipe was originally from "Vegan Cookies Invade Your Cookie Jar", then reworked by Marilla of Cupcake Rehab, then played around with a little by me. Whew!

2 ½ cups all-purpose flour, sifted
½ cup unsalted butter, softened
1 cup sugar
1 teaspoon baking soda
¼ teaspoon salt
2 ½ teaspoons ground ginger
½ teaspoon ground allspice
1 to 1½ teaspoon cinnamon
1 egg
½ cup molasses
1/4 cup milk

Unroll a fairly large piece of plastic wrap and sprinkle lightly with flour. Set aside. Cream the butter & sugar until light and fluffy. Mix flour, baking soda, salt, cinnamon, allspice and ginger together in a medium bowl; set aside. Add egg and molasses one at a time to butter/sugar mixture, beating after each until combined. Add flour mixture gradually, until a sticky dough forms. Add the milk and mix well by hand. Form a dough into a ball the best you can and place it on the plastic wrap, rolling it up tightly. Chill for an hour or two. Remove dough from fridge and if too firm, let sit for 20-25 minutes before rolling out. The dough will be quite sticky, so have flour on hand. Preheat oven to 350° degrees. Roll out the dough onto lightly floured surface to about ¼ – ½” thick. Using cookie cutters, cut out shapes and using a thin spatula, carefully place onto cookie sheet lined with parchment paper. The cookies will be soft and sticky, so be careful if you want the shapes to stay nice. Re-roll the scraps left over until you haven’t got enough left to use. Just be careful to give your cookies plenty of space on the sheet and don't place them too close to the edges of the pan (bake in multiple batches, if needed). Bake for 8 minutes. Remove from oven and allow to cool on the sheet for 5 minutes, then move to a wire rack to cool completely.

I can't warn you enough about how sticky this dough gets. You will curse, and may require help. I thought that ball of dough would never let go of my hands. But once it was chilled, working it on the floured surface was no problem. Re-roll it into a ball and dust it with flour as soon as it becomes temperamental and you'll win.

They don't expand that much, but the shape gets funny if they are too close together. Also, when they come out of the oven, the cookies will be soft. Give them a few minutes to cool and they will solidify. Do not be tempted to overcook them, or they will lose their chewy bite. Depending on how thick you make your cookies, and how big your cookie-cutters are, you'll get 24 to 36 cookies out of one batch of this dough.

Of course, you can use cookie-cutters of any shape, and go as crazy or as minimalist as you want with the decoration. I did not have a lot of time of my hands, so I sprinkled red sugar, rainbow and chocolate sprinkles on the cookies before putting them in the oven. Easy-peasy. But if you want to go crazy with decorating, I suggest making some of the following simple royal icing, and getting your hands on a few different colored sugars. I personally love the white icing with brightly colored sprinkles on top.

4 cups powdered sugar

4 tablespoons milk or water
4 tablespoons meringue powder

Mix all ingredients together in a medium bowl. If too thick, add more liquid, if too thin, add more sugar. Add food coloring if desired.

Keep the cookies in an air-tight plastic container when they are not being tortured and eaten.

The Comfort of Chocolate Chip Cookies (and a Rant)

My mother used to call me Cookie Monster: she'd buy a bag of Chips Ahoy, and my brother and I would make the contents of that bag vanish before she had time to put the rest of the groceries away. It was impressive, but then, we were growing adolescents... To this day, I still eat my cookies like a kid, curled up on the couch or in my reading chair, with a big glass of milk. The only difference is that I now content myself with 1 or 2 cookies, instead of scarfing down half the bag. Oh, the wisdom that comes with age and with a slowing metabolism...

The past few weeks at work have been on the crazy side, and I decided that a little home-made, chocolate-y comfort food was in order. Also, the days getting dramatically shorter make me want to curl up at home and pout. I miss the sunlight, and even if cold weather gives me the opportunity to whip up stews, soups and other awesome rich winter dishes I sometimes long for in summer, I still miss the days where my hoodie is something I put on to take an evening stroll, not a clothing item I wear all day long. So a little "pick me up" treat with loads of sugar was in order.

My last attempt at baking cookies was not exactly successful, probably because I got ambitious and picked a rather elaborate recipe that my baking-skills were not quite ready to tackle. Somehow, making cupcakes is much easier for me than making cookies. Go figure. So I decided to go with a very simple and classic cookie, something almost fail-proof: chocolate chips!

I had one ingredient I absolutely wanted to add to my cookies, and that ingredient is white chocolate. I know, I know: white chocolate is nothing but sugar, with very little of the healthy cocoa found in the good dark chocolate that nutritionists recommend we eat. But when I am flattened with exhaustion on my couch, the nutritional concern goes out the window and I just want to bask in the sinful deliciousness of the white chocolate. I am a sugar-bug deep down inside, and I love the intoxicating sweetness of white chocolate. It's my crack.

Now a little disclaimer about cooking in general, particularly baking. I had to deal with some rather narrow-minded remarks when people realize that I love my kitchen time. As if being inked, having purple hair and listening to the Dead Kennedys automatically meant that I was some sort of culinary-inept bum. As I mentioned before, nothing is more punk-rock and DIY than home-cooking. Also, cooking is an amazing and rewarding way to spend time. I don't know how other people feel when they are cooking, but it can be almost meditative: you have to be in the here and now (especially with baking)! It keeps me focused, on top of being a creative and experimental endeavor. I'm always learning, always having fun, and I eat delicious meals all the time.

The "housewife" in this blog's title is ironic, because of all the archaic stereotypes associated with the word. I use it to poke fun at the idea that people who like to cook and enjoy their homes are Martha Stewart drones. Hopefully, some prejudice somewhere will be destroyed by bad-ass chicks who can bake up a storm.

Now let's make cookies!

I got this chocolate chip cookie recipe from "Vegan Cookies Invade Your Cookie Jar", which also contains a whole wheat version. I baked the classic recipe mostly because I didn't have any whole wheat flour at home. Oops! And obviously, I substituted the classic semi-sweet chocolate chips for white chocolate ones. Feel free to got nuts (no pun intended) with the chips: use whatever chocolate you like and add dried fruits and walnuts if the mood strikes. Even butterscotch chips could work here, if you want to be insanely decadent, but the cookies may no longer be vegan...

1/2 cup brown sugar
1/4 cup white sugar
2/3 cup canola oil
1/4 cup unsweetened non-dairy milk
1 tablespoon tapioca powder or cornstarch
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt
3/4 cup chocolate chips

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Lightly grease 2 baking sheets. Combine the sugars, oil, milk and tapioca flour (or cornstarch) in a mixing bowl. Use a strong fork and mix really well, for about 2 minutes, until the mixture resembles smooth caramel. Mix in the vanilla. Add 1 cup of flour, the baking soda and salt. Mix until well incorporated. Mix in the rest of the flour. Fold in the chocolate chips. The dough will be a little stiff, so use the hands to really work the chips in. Roll the dough into ping-pong ball-sized balls. Flatten them with the hands to 2 1/2 inches. Place 8 on each baking sheet and bake for 8 to 10 minutes, until they get just a bit browned around the edges. Let cool on the baking sheet for 5 minutes, then transfer to a cooling rack and cool completely before serving.

I make big cookies, so I get anywhere between 12 and 16 with this amount of dough, but you can make them smaller and get 24. If you do make smaller cookies, reduce the baking time by a couple of minutes, or they will get very crunchy. Also, this dough is sticky, so I recommend flouring your hands carefully before making your dough balls, otherwise, they will stick to your fingers very stubbornly. Your reward for the flour-mess will be delicious cookies that are just sweet enough, with a crispy outside and a moist inside. This is also a practical recipe, because the mixing is all done in one big bowl, which means less dishes to clean; something I never fail to appreciate.

The big glass of milk is not mandatory, but it's wonderfully comforting. Besides, doesn't it just make you giddy, dipping a big cookie in some milk and chomping down on it like a rabid maniac? Is that just me?...

Store those babies is a air-tight plastic container to keep them fresh and double the batch if you have company. These cookies disappear alarmingly fast!